


That Time Taako Dated Someone With A Worse Grasp of Their Emotions Than Himself

by malaxis



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: First "I love you", Light Romance, M/M, every other character is just a background mention, kravitz being a nerd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-23 09:27:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14931626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malaxis/pseuds/malaxis
Summary: ...by Fall Out BoyTaako is the first to say "I love you." Kravitz, countless years old, and without any grasp of how to act normal anymore, runs away without a response. Taako is used to rejection anyway, but he can't keep Kravitz off his mind. But with the end of the world upon them, there's the chance he'll never get a response out of Kravitz.Set between the date at the Chug 'n' Squeeze, and the mission to Wonderland.





	That Time Taako Dated Someone With A Worse Grasp of Their Emotions Than Himself

**Author's Note:**

> I was hit over the head with the need to write this, after angus-mcdonald-official on tumblr made a long post with this idea. Please go visit their blog for all that good good TAZ content!!! Thank them for coming up with this idea!!!

Taako doesn’t know much, but he knows there’s something powerful between him and Kravitz. There’s a pull between them much the way he initially felt a pull towards Merle and Magnus—but, like, romantically, because Magnus is more like a weird younger brother and Merle is like a weird Dad-uncle. Kravitz is like a weird dead romantic interest and...well, Taako’s whole life is just weird. He lives on the moon.

Things aren’t “official” with Kravitz, because Taako’s a little inept when it comes to Big Important Conversations About Emotions, and also who would need anything more than the small hope of his continued presence in their lives? He’s a gift, a delight, an ethereal beauty far beyond the average person’s hopes and dreams, and he knows it. And anyway, even an idiot like himself can see this: Kravitz is immersed in and consumed by his work. He has not made time for leisure, much less romantic pursuits, in a long time. There is less than a minuscule chance that Kravitz is seeing anyone else. Taako sure isn’t. So they’re not  _official_ , but they sure are something like exclusive.

And he knows, somewhere in his shriveled little heart, that this could be going somewhere. Feels it. They haven’t been dating long, and their schedules are mismatched like crazy, especially with the Director training her reclaimers harder than ever before, but. Taako leaves a message on Kravitz’ stone almost once a day, and Kravitz does the same. If they’re lucky, sometimes their free time will align and they’ll get a quick bite, or have a quick museum tour, or kiss until Taako’s forehead is misty and his breath is gone and Kravitz’ Queen has pulled him away again. If this was just a little bit of fun, Taako doesn’t think either of them would be putting in so much effort to see each other without the guarantee of sex every time. Whatever is happening between them, is more palpable than passing the time with someone attractive.

He hopes Kravitz knows that.

When he calls this evening after a particularly terrible training session, he fully expects to leave another message, pass the fuck out, and have a new response waiting in the morning. Gods, he’s exhausted. Lounging on his bed, chin propped up in his hand, he might even be too tired to do his nightly skincare regimen. He's still gonna  _do_  it, though, like, that's  _stupid_? 

His eyes slip closed as he waits for the familiar ten soft rings of an unanswered stone to play to him and then a different tone for recording a message, but it never comes. Four rings and silence. Or he fell asleep for an hour and has been recording his snores this whole time. Kravitz would probably listen to the whole message with a smile on his face.

“Taako?”

Taako startles out of what probably would have been a sick trance given 30 more seconds, confused and surprised by an answer from the other end of the line. Never one to dismiss a chance at dramatics, he plays it up.

“Kravitz? Is...is that you? After all this time?” He’s rewarded with a soft chuckle in response.

“You’ve been so strong, Taako. Gone an entire five days without me.”

It’s Taako’s turn to laugh, and he does so with relish. “I’m surprised you answered. We keep missing each other.”

“A lucky break, I think. I might even have a couple hours of free time in me.”

This is what gets Taako to finally sit up. He’s tired as all hell for sure, but there’s no way he passes up an opportunity to see his man, not when he knows the Director’s probably literal hours from throwing a big mission on their laps.

“Free time, huh?” He’s already crossed the room to the standing mirror, examining his face and wiping some stray eyeliner from the corner of his eye. Date now, skincare later. “You wanna do something?”

“I would love that.” The utter sincerity in Kravitz’ voice would make Taako barf if it didn’t make his face warm and his stomach fill up with like, moths or something. And he definitely isn't smiling about it, enormous grin splitting his face. In fact, he's never smiled in his life at anything, ever. He tells his smiling, lovesick reflection.

“Wanna carry my shopping bags while I buy out Neverwinter? Oh, and I guess we can get ice cream or something.”

***

Taako doesn’t end up buying out Neverwinter. In fact, he doesn’t even pay for the ice cream, because Kravitz is a real gentleman who had to wrestle Taako out of the way in order to give the very amused cashier a handful of gold. Taako's already secretly sworn to himself that he’ll get it next time, even if he has to Magic Missile his date to do it.

It’s late, and some shops are starting to close up by this time, although others remain open, signs lit by small lanterns in welcome. Taako is enjoying just window shopping, left hand connected to Kravitz’ right, ice cream in the opposite. His eyes may be everywhere, but his focus is on Kravitz, ears tilted in his direction, conversation flowing easily between them. It’s nice to spend some time together, even if this will only be a short date.

And it always is. It seems like no time has passed at all when Kravitz, gentleman extraordinaire, offers to bring him back up to the moonbase, suggesting that Taako’s probably had a long day, because he would never dream of mentioning that he looks tired, or that he’s yawned a hundred times in the last two hours. Taako begrudgingly agrees, but only if they continue their walk in the quad before saying goodnight—because he knows Kravitz is right, but he also wants to prolong this date.

It’s after another 15 minutes, when they've reached the end of the quad for a second time, that Taako sweeps in front of Kravitz to stop his movements, looking him straight in the eyes for a very prolonged moment.

“Hey,” Kravitz says, sweet and soft. “What are you thinking about?”

Taako breaks eye contact, losing his nerve momentarily. He reaches out for both of Kravitz’ hands, thumbs brushing back and forth along the cold veins of the backs of his hands.

“Nothing,” he says, glancing back up into Kravitz’ eyes before glancing away again. “Just...”

He loosens his hold on Kravitz’ hands, so that they’re only still connected by the surface pressure of their fingertips against each other’s. Breathes in, then out, then raises his gaze back to Kravitz, who’s patiently waiting for Taako’s next words.

“I love you.” It’s no grand statement, nor some offhand phrase, but a simple statement of fact, the only way Taako knows to express feelings genuinely. He doesn’t break eye contact again, stubbornly staring into Kravitz’ eyes even after he hasn’t said anything in response. In fact, he looks flabbergasted. Out of his depth. Like he’s receiving a call from the Raven Queen. Oh, Gods, he’s receiving a call from the Raven Queen! Right now, of all moments!

Taako lets his hands slip from Kravitz’ completely, crossing his arms around himself. He doesn’t take it back, though. He just leaves it out, airing like dirty laundry. Kravitz makes several aborted attempts to say something, wide eyes and fluttering lips reminding him of Magnus’ fish, Steven. It’s okay if Kravitz doesn’t love him back, he expected that much, although he didn’t expect this ache in him. He just wishes the man would say something instead of floundering for a gentlemanly way to say he doesn’t feel the same. Taako can take it, he thinks. Maybe.

“I—I have to go,” Kravitz finally says, like he’s suffocating. Taako looks away then. He doesn’t care to see pity in Kravitz’ eyes. “But, Taako, it—I—“

“It’s okay,” Taako interrupts, relieving Kravitz of any responsibility to respond. “Your Queen needs you.”

He feels the hesitation rolling off of Kravitz, watches his shoes glint as he takes a shuffling step forward, then back. Then back. Then back. The telltale sound of a scythe slices through the air.

“I’ll call you,” Taako mumbles.

***

He doesn’t get the chance.

The next morning, he’s on the road between Magnus and Merle, journeying to Wonderland on an hour of meditation. He spent the night restless, fretting, feeling unloved and unlovable, and too heartsick to call Kravitz, not even in the morning to tell him that his next mission had been assigned. He lets the easy companionship of his friends—his family—ease the pain of rejection, lets the jokes and the journey take him, buoyed by the contentment of familiarity, of loyalty, of knowing where he stands with these idiots. Because he’s an idiot too, and he fits right in without even having to try.

 

He’s glad to have them, through Wonderland. They’re what he focuses on when his thoughts get too dark, when the endless cycle of torture gets too much, when his mind lingers too long on that infinite stretch of silence between him and Kravitz the previous night. Feelings of inadequacy, of his past and his character, keep pressing at his soul, telling him that no one could love him, least of all Kravitz—but Merle sacrifices a lot of HP to keep Taako going, and Magnus offers to take the penalty if Taako refused to give up his beauty, and...well, it’s a little easier to believe that Kravitz is the one missing out. Taako’s good. He’s great, in fact. Still got his charm, even if he’s lost his grace and his beauty and some life force and any hope he had of goodness in the world.

  
Taako may be an idiot, but he’s not stupid. When the Animus Bell rings, when Magnus stumbles backward, and something falls out of his body, he knows immediately that something is wrong. He doesn’t even need to hear Magnus speak to know that that’s not him anymore. Magnus isn’t in there, which means he’s crossing over to the other side, which means Taako can’t spend another  _millisecond_  listening to this damn  _lich_ attempting to mimic his brother. He does the only thing he can think of, and careens out of his body, toward Magnus, toward home.  
And there’s Kravitz, in the astral plane, breaking the surface of the impetuous waters, and everything in Taako yearns to go to him, pull him out and into his arms, and kiss him silly. And everything in Taako yearns to grab Kravitz by the shoulders, shake him like a rag doll, and ask, WHY WON’T YOU JUST TELL ME HOW YOU FEEL??? But he doesn’t, he can’t, he can only hope Kravitz is okay as he and Magnus are fished out of this plane by Merle.

***

He loses the extra head space for Kravitz after that, because too much is happening, everything is going to shit, and he can’t afford to devote so much of his tiny brain to his maybe-boyfriend when the world is ending.

  
The world is ending and he doesn’t know how to stop it. The Director might be a bad guy, but Taako trusts Angus, he loves Merle, he worries about Magnus, and his mind still briefly wanders to Kravitz. But he can’t sink into those thoughts right now, he has to stand strong with Merle and Angus and Barry, because things are wrong and the Director is bad and the baby voidfish’s ichor is doing something to his head.

  
The world is ending and he doesn’t care. The hunger found them, his sister is gone, his family is torn apart by lies and betrayal. He only fights because it’s what he’s been doing his whole life. Fighting for survival with Lup as children. Fighting for the good of everything for a century. Fighting to fill a space in his heart with fame, that had been meant for family, for almost a decade on the road. Fighting for ~The Director~, for the relics, for a bed and some shitty roommates who understood him better than anyone in the world. It’s habit by now. It’s the only reason he’s still fighting, Lup’s ridiculous umbrella shooting off spells in his hand.

  
The world is ending and he can do something about it. The hunger can’t take this one away from him. Not with his family back together, splintered but strong. Not with every new connection he’s made since joining the Bureau of Balance. Not with love for Kravitz thrumming loudly in his chest. Who cares if Kravitz doesn’t love him back? Taako’s got enough love in him for a thousand lifetimes. Enough raw power to call a billion souls back from the Astral Plane. When he slams his hands onto the black glass that was once Phandalin, nothing else matters but every connection to every living and dead thing in every reality. Every invisible bond vibrates through him, around him, and there, in the center of the ghost town of Phandalin, is Kravitz.

At that moment, Taako doesn’t care where they stand, last conversation tossed out with yesterday’s garbage as he runs forward and kisses the death out of Kravitz. When he pulls back, he looks for hesitation in Kravitz’ eyes. Taako isn’t dumb; he knows that wherever this goes, it’s on Kravitz now, regardless of the fact that they’re in the middle of a world-destroying battle.

But he remembers who he is, now. It’ll hurt if Kravitz rejects him, but he can take it. He’s had a century to learn how to take losses. He doesn’t have to cut and dice his personality to fit what he thinks a potential partner might like. So he drops his glamour, because it’s easier to take the hit all at once, and waits for Kravitz’ response.

“Taako, I was crazy about you, before some weird light told me a story about your one-hundred-year journey through existence where you were fighting for a century to save the world.”

Taako smiles a little at that, eyes trained on Kravitz’ face. He carries nothing of the hesitation he had before, tenderness in his eyes and resolve strong on his jaw.

“I love you, Taako,” —and relief floods through Taako, joy and hope and newfound strength— “and at this point, I think that everyone in reality is going to love you after hearing your story, and… nothing’s gonna change that.”

Taako resists the urge to pull Kravitz close and kiss him again, instead opting for aloof. Kravitz knows him. Kravitz loves him. He knows what Taako’s really feeling when he says, “That was actually a test, your face is a skull half the time?”

And Kravitz  _does_  know, he smiles, and when the world rattles with a new explosion, he’s there beside Taako like he was always meant to be there. And Taako’s not an idiot. He knows that this time, Kravitz is there to stay. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! You can find me on tumblr at malaxis!


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